Goddesstopia, and the journey of a disciple

“Today I want to talk about my journey with Goddesstopia, that began one week ago. For those who are looking at this and are unaware, Goddesstopia is a site overseen by Superior Goddess Greed that celebrates the religious belief in Female Supremacy, and provides an opportunity for a group of Goddesses to oversee the training of inferior males in those ways. I, obviously, am one of those inferior males.

Goddesstopia started out for me as a thing I thought I was doing for fun. When I tell the story of myself as a submissive male and give my history, I am telling the truth… but I’m not telling the whole truth. Submissiveness has been a fantasy, and like a fantasy, I was really roleplaying a character when I engaged in submissive behavior, not being myself. Joining Goddesstopia was part of the game. It is a game I played well. I should, I’ve been observing the dance from the outside for nearly a decade. I introduced myself.

I thought for sure that very quickly the assigned tasks would become ridiculous, I would either refuse to do them or lie about having done them,  and would eventually lose interest. Instead, the tasks were managable. They made me contemplate the game I was playing, and my place in it. There were honest, frank discussions about fetishes, and how they should be approached respectfully. I began to show flashes of myself in my “character”. The walls between us began to crumble.

Meanwhile, the character was in heaven. Having this base of encouragement to operate from has encouraged me to explore my submissiveness in a way I never have before. I’ve spent the last week in a haze, offering service and tribute to various women, humiliating myself on camera, taking pictures of my body marked for the amusement of women, it’s been intoxicatingly fun. In fact, today is the day the haze lifted and I’ve started thinking with my brain more, and I may have bit off slightly more than I can chew, but most of it was done in a way that didn’t commit me further, and I think I can manage it properly.

In a weird twist, I have become more confident. Once you embrace the inherent lower position that comes with the submissive experience and belief in Female Supremacy, your average fear of rejection stops bothering you. When dominant Women who you worship are degrading you for Their amusement, what does someone else telling you “no” matter anymore? I have sent more messages in the last week in a vanilla fashion on a regular dating sites than I have in the past several years.

As I mentioned, today the haze and obsession began to lift, and I began to feel like myself again, not lost in the character I play as a submissive. This begs the question of what next? Goddesstopia has proved intimidating, and three of my fellow disciples appear to have left the fold already. However, I have much more to do. First, I need to explore what it means to be Josh the submissive, not “Josh, the guy who plays a submissive on the internet for kicks.” That guy is starting to appear, and I kind of like him way more than I thought I would. Second, while the playing the field of submission whirlwind has been fun, I need to prepare myself for a more meaningful relationship, either with a Goddess, Domme, etc. or in my daily, vanilla life. There are many more lessons to learn about how to do that well. How to serve a Woman’s interests and happiness. Finally, while Goddesstopia has provided me with the courage, support, and background needed to do this, I need to show more appreciation and attention to the Goddesses actually running it, who deserve the credit for much of this growth. It’s been a great journey so far, and I can’t wait to see what the future holds.”

Josh

http://www.Goddesstopia.com

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